Thursday, April 19, 2012

Broken Promises

{This photo seemed appropriate enough for the semi-serious nature of this post; but in reality I just like it 'cause it's pretty}

Promises to yourself are the hardest to keep. 

Especially when you're a perfectionist and a control freak--basically your standard Type-A worry wart. I've made so many promises to myself since the beginning of my college career that I can't even begin to count how many I've made, broken, and then recanted. They mostly pertain to goals that I've set for myself such as maintaining this blog, losing weight (AKA learning to deal with binge eating disorder), and maintaining both grades and a social life. Looking back, I see that these goals were lofty and idealistic; not really something I could use will power alone to overcome. They're also more like long-term processes that need to be accomplished with much self-discipline, hard work, and motivation. 
So that's why I've chosen a different approach. Rather than promises, that seem like a pass or fail kind route to accomplishing my goals, I'm going to focus on effort, celebrating the little achievements, and simply living life a day at time.

As cheese-tastic as this may sound, it's a step in the right direction for me. It's a blog post for one, but it's also a promise to myself to stop seeing things in black and white; it's a self-reflection on the methods of the past that haven't worked out for me. It's a message to keep in mind on those days when binging on food seems like the only way out, or when I'm feeling too fat to even belong anywhere near the fashion industry. 
This, my friends, is the equivalent of that corny "keep your head up" kind of song that every artist feels compelled to release on his/her album. 
In the scheme of things, I've made mistakes-- back-tracked even-- but the point is that I'm trying. And as long as I have the motivation, I think I'll be alright.

Wow, you read all of this? Cheers, my friend. Thanks for not bailing on my page. 

Don't worry, be happy.

Image via tumblr

by Sam